8pm Thu 26 June: Buenos Aires, great as this city is, has one huge problem: just how, I mean how, how on earth, do you choose between the sirloin (lomo) and rump (chorizo)? The tenderest steak cut...or the tastiest?
Nati and I bravely faced this daunting dilemma, and, after munching inch-thick slabs for the last nine days of our nine-month trip, we can confidently announce the winner is...the...wait for it...rump! That's because, in BA, the tastiest is also the tenderest.
Our favourite was at La Cabrera (also visited by our pals Marcus and Colette on their honeymoon a month ago (congrats!)); a two-and-a-half-inch-thick chunk of beef with TWELVE side orders.
Marcus: if, as you claim, you really finished the whole thing plus sides, you're more of a man than me.
Tearing ourselves away from the steaks, we demolished a couple of ham, salami, pate, cheese and olive platters
As if that wasn't enough, the ice cream (fruitilla and dulce de leche for Nati; chocolate & almonds...oh my God...for me) makes Mr Whippy taste like Aldi Value.
And the wine, oh the wine, the red, red, beautiful wine...sorry, lost focus there...is soooo drinkable. Tough to squeeze in a Quilmes 1-litre beer or two.
With all this amazing food and drink, it's not that surprising BA, South America's most European city, has restaurants on EVERY corner. The rest of town is an addictive mix of giant Palermo and Recoleta mansions, towering apartment blocks, porteno locals, their egos, and gritty streets like those in Boca.
Nati and I actually met in hostel in BA's San Telmo district three years ago.
We called in for a drink this time but upgraded our accommodation to the gorgeous 1551 Palermo (http://www.1551palermo.com/), a snip at £20-a-night for a double in a gorgeous mansion, with 7-metre high ceilings and a resident sculptor, Reynaldo, on reception.
BA time runs three hours behind England, so we got up at 11, had lunch at 3, dinner at 11 and at 2.30am, went clubbing. Yes, as in ARRIVED at the club at 2.30am.
Our BA clubbing odyssey actually started badly.
Opera Bay, modelled on Sydney Opera House and undoubtedly one of the world's coolest clubs when I last visited, has been criminally demolished to make way for a hotel.
Bad went to worse when our cab pulled up at Mint, the best Friday option, to find it closed for four months.
Our luck improved at Crobar, an unheated (it's winter in BA) modern version of London's Cross (also criminally demolished last year) with some smashing electro house.
The next night, we hit BA's branch of Pacha, a white, Ibiza-esque superclub with an overcrowded, smokey main floor and cooler, pumping funky house room upstairs.
Toca's Miracle by Fragma might not be the coolest tune in a DJ's box but, boy, it still rocks 10 years on.
BA is great but not without it's problems. Graffiti defaces most buildings and piles of dog dirt make an unpleasant pavement obstacle course.
But the good outweighs the bad.
We hit the gym, a small room jammed with so many machines and equipment that people were lifting weights over each other; saw Evita's grave; watched Boca Juniors thump Tigre 6-2 in a meaningless but fun end-of-season game - and went shopping.
Now shopping is usually Nati's artform and, in fact, her raison d'etre...but, either she drugged me or the Sex and The City movie had a subliminal message targeting men - as I got addicted too. I even dreamt about shopping last night. What a loser!
So BA was an awesome way to end our round-the-world trip. If you get chance to go to BA, do it. Hi to everyone and thanks for the blog comments. You can comment by clicking the ‘COMMENTS’ tab below. Click on 'Anonymous' to publish comment.
Ali & Nati
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